Daddy Long Legs Plague!

This is a re-post from a blog I wrote way back in 2006(!?!).  There isn’t a current plague, but if one happens after this, rest assured that it was me who predicted it, I’m ace, and you should tell everyone.

I’ve just had a bit of a chat in my lunch break where the subject of Daddy Long Legs came up – I stated that they are totally pointless creatures, whose only reason for existence is to fly around dangling their legs over your face and freaking you out.  That reminded me of this rant I once had, when these buggers were EVERYWHERE one Summer.  Enjoy!

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Yes, it’s Official (err, because I’ve said it) – there is current plague in the UK of Daddy Longlegs!

The gangly-dangly-legged buggers are all over the shop! They’ve obviously discovered some kind of Viagra, or their TV sets have packed up, or something, because they’ve been shagging more than a $2 hooker at a stag night.And why do they want to get in your house so badly? Any tiny window open and they storm it like a scene from Braveheart! It’s not like they do much when they get inside, either – they just flop around trying to drag their legs over your face, then sit on the wall doing bugger all! Maybe they are trying to watch your TV…

They could at least try and be entertaining. Or even be a bit more lively!I mean, come on! One out of ten for effort!If they had voices, they’d have little whiny ones moaning about how it’s too hot, too cold, too far etc…

And I’d be the first to tell them to shut their bug-eyed, tiny-gobbed, horse-nosed faces!

Perhaps if they stung or bit it’d spice them up? But no – if you even try to grab them, all that happens is their legs drop off! Good thinking there, Lanky! Great defense!

The only thing they are good for is feeding all the spiders up so there’s loads of them in Extra Large Fat Bellied Size this year – and we don’t thank you for that, you dopey bastards!So here’s to the Daddy Long Legs – feeble giver-upper of the insect world:

QUITTERS!!!!!!!!!!

Some info from Wikipedia (link now changed from original posting) – check these names out!!!:

Crane flies (Tilupidae) are a family of insects resembling giant mosquitoes. Like the mosquito, they are in the order Diptera (flies). They are sometimes called mosquito eaters, lollygaggers, gallinippers, gollywhoppers, chicken flies, mosquito hawks, leather jackets, Jimmy Spinners or skeeter eaters. Crane flies are also popularly called Daddy longlegs along with two other species.

Daddy Long Legs Plague!

This is a repost from a blog I wrote way back in 2006(!?!).  There isn’t a current plague, but if one happens after this, rest assured that it was me who predicted it, I’m ace, and you should tell everyone.

I’ve just had a bit of a chat in my lunch break where the subject of Daddy Long Legs came up – I stated that they are totally pointless creatures, whose only reason for existence is to fly around dangling thier legs over your face and freaking you out.  That reminded me of this rant I once had, when these buggers were EVERYWHERE one Summer.  Enjoy!

——

Yes, it’s Official (err, because I’ve said it) – there is current plague in the UK of Daddy Longlegs!

The gangly-dangly-legged buggers are all over the shop! They’ve obviously discovered some kind of Viagra, or their TV sets have packed up, or something, because they’ve been shagging more than a $2 hooker at a stag night.And why do they want to get in your house so badly? Any tiny window open and they storm it like a scene from Braveheart! It’s not like they do much when they get inside, either – they just flop around trying to drag their legs over your face, then sit on the wall doing bugger all! Maybe they are trying to watch your TV…

They could at least try and be entertaining. Or even be a bit more lively!I mean, come on! One out of ten for effort!

If they had voices, they’d have little whiney ones moaning about how it’s too hot, too cold, too far etc…

And I’d be the first to tell them to shut their bug-eyed, tiny-gobbed, horse-nosed faces!

Perhaps if they stung or bit it’d spice them up? But no – if you even try to grab them, all that happens is their legs drop off! Good thinking there, Lanky! Great defence!

The only thing they are good for is feeding all the spiders up so there’s loads of them in Extra Large Fat Bellied Size this year – and we don’t thank you for that, you dopey bastards!

So here’s to the Daddy Long Legs – feeble giver-upper of the insect world:

QUITTERS!!!!!!!!!!

Some info from Wikipedia (link now changed from original posting) – check these names out!!!:

Crane flies (Tilupidae) are a family of insects resembling giant mosquitoes. Like the mosquito, they are in the order Diptera (flies). They are sometimes called mosquito eaters, lollygaggers, gallinippers, gollywhoppers, chicken flies, mosquito hawks, leather jackets, Jimmy Spinners or skeeter eaters. Crane flies are also popularly called Daddy longlegs along with two other species.