GTA 5: It’s… ok…

GTA 5: It’s… ok…

I had fallen out of playing games for years until my mate Steve leant me his Playstation 2 along with a copy of Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas.

From that moment I was hooked again.  I missed food.  I played until 4am on work nights, figuring if I could learn to fly the damned plane (as “White Wedding” blasted through the speakers) around the airfield and land it again, that would compensate for how I’d be feeling getting up for work ina  couple of hours time.

I bought San Andreas again for the Xbox after I’d played GTA IV almost to death.

So it’s no real surprise, after 4 years and £170 million spent on making GTA V, that I’d place my first ever pre-order for a game.

It didn’t arrive on the day of release.  Getting over the disappointment of that, I survived to find that it did arrive the day after!

Because I’m an Idiot (Town Idiot, in fact, as I moved from my Village), the first thing I did was swap it for my old copy of GTA IV, took a pic, and uploaded it to Facebook pretending not to notice it was the wrong game until afterwards.  Hehehe.  I do sometimes think I’m funny – and not just in the head.

As everyone was laughing at my expense, I booted GTA V up in eager anticipation…

It takes AGES to install the content, too!

Finally getting to play, as you’ll have seen in a million other reviews, you’re dropped into a bank robbery where you have to escape the Police before the game jumps forward a few years and starts properly.

My ultimate hope was for the game to be a cross between IV and San Andreas, and on that score, it does seem to be spot on.

First impressions are that the target showing where you’re shooting isn’t really clear enough.

The ‘help text’ that pops up on screen (“Hold RT to touch the lapdancer with your hands” etc) is tiny!  I think everyone is assumed to be on benefits so they play games on their 128″ HD plasma-LCD-super TV, so text size doesn’t matter.  I work for a living, so can only afford an old 36″ CRT TV (widescreen!!), which means if I want to make out the ‘help text’ I have to jump off my couch and crouch near enough to the screen to read it, and even then guess what button the illustration is actually telling me to press.

This is A Pisser.

I’m sure once I’m used to the controls it won’t be a problem – but come on!  How about a way to at least increase font size?

The storyline is as engaging as ever (I’m not going to get into it, as other reviews will do a better job), and, as you’d expect, the radio stations and music are totally awesome!  With the older GTA games I’d often park up somewhere and just listen to the radio on the game, and you can be sure part 5 will be the same!

The vehicles seem to handle a little more realistically – the biggest change being that you can’t just ram another car out of teh way by holding the throttle, or you just get stuck.

So, it’s as expected (which isn’t a bad thing!), but with nothing so far that’s totally blown my head off.

I can’t see me going quite as mental over it as I did with San Andreas – but give it another week and that might change.

One thing I do know is that last week, my fiancee was off work ill.

Now, a week on, I’m still fine and dandy.  You can bet that this is the one bloody time I actually wouldn’t mind a few days off sick, but of course I’m not going to catch The Lurgy!

If I don’t come down with anything soon, I think I’ll have to book a day or two off work to have a proper play!

Have you played it yet?  What do you think?

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