Don’t Bother Insuring Your Car/Bike – It’s Worth The Risk!
First off, I’ll make it clear that all my vehicles ARE fully insured, but I can see why people wouldn’t bother insuring theirs.
Insurance companies are absolutely terrible cunts.
If you’re loyal to them, they will put up your policy price when you renew. I call it a Stupid Tax for those who can’t be botherd to shop around, but the fact is they still do it deliberately to rip people off. They are NOT loyal to you in any way, so why should you be to them?
Once you do find a policy that you can fucking afford without turning to prostitution, you find you have to pay an ‘excess’ – basically this means that if anything happens (i.e. the whole reason you have insurance in the first place), you – yes YOU have to fucking pay anyway before the fucktards at your insurance company will get the chance to rip you off again!
So you insure your £700 car, and notice you have to pay out £500 before they pay a penny. Let’s assume on that £700 you’re paying the average price of £500 (PER YEAR!?!?!), then when you make a claim of course the fucking retards tell you your car is only worth £500 due to depreciation, so you’re fucked.
You pay £500, they pay nothing.
THEN, they properly kick you in the balls for the next 5 years by making you pay more on every policy you take out!
This is whether the claim was your fault or not. How in the Jesus Titty-Fucking Christ is that even LEGAL?!?
Then there is car and/or bike insurance.
You have to take two separate tests for two separate licenses. But crash your car, and you have to declare that on your bike insurance, and so they BOTH go up for 5 years!
And you have 7 years No Claims discount for your car? Oh, but you want a second car as well?
You can only drive one car at a time, right?
Right! Well fuck you – you can only use your No Claims discount on ONE policy!
Want a car AND a bike?
Fuck you – you have to buy a policy for each.
I pay £130 per yer fully comprehensive on my 190mph superbike. I recently bought an old shitter of a 500cc slow and sensible learner bike.
I honestly thought I could add this bike to my policy for around £20. I called up my insurance company (DIRECT CHOICE – there’s your mantion you fat, greedy, robbing cunts! *waves*) who took my details and offered to add this little bike onto the big bike policy for… how much do you think?
That’s right – FIVE HUNDRED CUNTY-BASTARD POUNDS STERLING!
It still makes em laugh now. I did a quick price comparison search (not allowed to use my NCD, remember) for a brand new policy and got one for £70.
Direct Choice you are utter, utter useless feeble cunts. Thanks for your help, and confirming that if you EVER call your insurance company after you’ve bought the policy, they stick their big fat cock up your arse without any lube.
And I even get a free cuddly Meercat toy ony my new bike policy.